It's a funny concept guilt but what good is it really doing for us anyway?
It is a tricky topic I'll give you that however let's break it down and get to understand it a little better.
So what is the purpose of us humans feeling this emotion we have become so reliant on, guilt!? What purpose does it serve us, yet it is something we find ourselves feeling majority of our day? I feel guilty for eating that kit-kat, I feel guilty for not playing with the kids enough today, I feel guilty for missing my 6am gym class, I feel guilty for not putting make up on when I went grocery shopping and ran into people I know. That last one is never anything I feel guilty for but we are all different and that is ok! The point is this emotion would be felt more often by humans than say love or kindness and that breaks my heart.
Let's quickly go back to what purpose does feeling guilty actually serve us? And let's follow up that question with another question. How do you feel when you are feeling guilty? Personally, I feel disappointed and deflated. So then why do we do it to ourselves? If you just rewind back to what exactly you are feeling guilty about (awareness is key), you'll realise what the initial action or thought was that brought on this feeling and then secondly you go straight into action. How to resolve this feeling of guilt. Because 9/10 there is always a solution to this emotion.
Didn't play with your kids enough this afternoon, that's ok! Life get's busy the WIN here is that you are aware you could of played with them more. Tonight when you are tucking them into bed, tell them. Tomorrow afternoon we are going to play.... whatever it is that you all like to do together. Let them know that not every day is going to be like today and tomorrow will be better. Guilt over, no more. Ate too much sugar today? That's ok, what is done is done and you can't change it but what you can change is tomorrow set yourself a mini goal not to eat anything that comes out of a packet and move on!!
Do you see where I am going with this? There is no point allowing ourselves to feel guilty at every twist and turn in our 24hrs because where does it get us? Nowhere. It is not a great way to feel and when your sitting in the emotion of guilty you start to turn into a negative individual and there is no need for it. Especially when "guilt" can be turned around and changed 9/10, if we allow ourselves. You must be willing to be more mindful of our emotional state if we are ever going to be "better" humans. Want to turn up 110% well do the fucking work and stop talking about it.
Quit feeling guilty, no it's not going to happen over night but put THE REPS in. You have to be willing to work on self improvement and do the reps over and over if you want to live a more positive and healthy lifestyle. And when I say healthy I mean mental health as well. We can't keep working on the exterior hoping that some day something on the inside is just going to click and get better just because you are going to the gym more or eating healthier. Yes, eating healthier is great and will help your internal world improve but you have to be willing to do more, go further with your health. Do something you have not done before because that my friends is where the results lie.
Clients come to me and one of the many questions I ask them in their initial goals session is this, What have. you tried before and why didn't it work? 9/10 they are unsure why it didn't work and 9/10 I will tell them it's because you didn't work on your mental state of mind. You're working to hard on the exterior and doing nothing with the interior. When really it needs to be the other way around.
Mindfulness and awareness will always be number one on my list of things to focus on when starting your own health and wellness journey. Whether it be fat loss, muscle gain, rehab, health, fitness or strength. Internal world before the external world EVERYTIME. And if you're not willing to work on the internal "stuff" than you my darling are simply just not ready for change. Contact me when enough is enough and you are willing to do the internal work BEFORE the external.
Love & light,
Coach B xx
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